The Fuel of Life 6.0: When the Game Slows Down

So I'm about to break a pretty big personal rule bare with me... I'm about to use a sports reference in real life. I'm truly sorry, I'll make it quick.

So next week, football season starts. We all start the weekly ritual of waking up early on Sunday so we can affect the rate of our heartbeat over and over again. We eat wings and drink beer to slow it down, then five minutes later, our team does something ridiculous, good or bad, to speed it up to an equally unhealthy level, then, after half time we repeat the process. It's okay though because between Sunday afternoon and Monday night, we take a break.

If you pay attention to the game though, you're bound to hear an announcer, in reference to a young, maturing quarterback, say something about how "the game is really slowing down for him".

For anyone who doesn't give an itch about football, allow me to explain, because after playing Madden football for 15 years, if there's one I can understand, it's that listening to football commentators is like going to a 4th grade violin recital; They try oh so hard, but the message is lost completely.

Football is a ridiculously difficult game that, when you break it down, is almost a practice in military strategy. In America, we've taken the superstars of football who have been successful at this epic game, and given them almost Greek Mythology positions in our society. Joe Namath, Tom Brady, Walter Payton, Barry Sanders, Don Shula, Bill Bellichik... It's ridiculous. Anyways, the game is a complicated game that only few men have been able to climb to the top of.

The game slowing down in football terms is when a quarterback plays in one of those epic games, and at some point experiences a huge moment. The light bulb goes off in his head, he "gets it" and from that point on, he understands the game better than every day previous, and any other man in his shoes. As he looks around the field, he sees things with a level of understanding he hadn't had until that point. He knows where his teammates are, and he can almost feel the presence of the other team's players before he can see them. The crowd noise becomes a whisper in his head, and furthermore, he becomes comfortable telling the crowd to shut their mouths every once in a while.

Lately, I've been feeling like I can relate to that. Allow me to explain as best I can and hope that you will relate and respond accordingly. It's all I've got...

I'm out here in San Diego, California for a little over 2 more weeks. It's been a whirlwind of life experience these last 2 years and change. Ups, downs, higher ups and lower downs, and I can't honestly say 2 and a half years has ever gone by quicker.

Coming out on the other side of things, as I always do, I'm looking back with a mental notepad, going over it all through my head. Asking myself all the important questions; the Hows and Whys. Not because I want to feel okay about anything, this experience has been incredible and at times overwhelming and I am more than appreciative of that. I ask the questions in the spirit of understanding. My skin is tougher than it's ever been before, my resolve more spirited, the screws holding my head to my shoulders seem a little tighter, and this game of life is beginning to feel like it's maybe, possibly slowing down.

As I usually bring up in most of these bloggings, I think we all, at least once a day, feel like this world and this life is so huge. At least once a day, I find myself looking around saying to myself... "son of a bitch... this is crazy." People everywhere, more being born every day. Buildings everywhere, but there's never enough. Technology slapping us in the face for not keeping up. I mean, when I was a kid, the phone would ring at your grandma's house, and everyone would race to pick it up so they could hear who it was. Today, while waiting for the bus, I returned an email to someone on my phone, yes MY phone. A phone that when you call, you can expect to hear only my voice (remember when you had to ask "is _____ there?") then checked a bus schedule on the same phone, then proceeded to go back to listening to music that was being streamed at CD quality, from a satellite 1000s of miles above my head in outer space. It's moments like those that make you feel so incredibly insignificant to this whole game being played, like... "really, what the hell CAN you do"?

So what is it for each of us that makes "the game slow down?" Am I complacent, or too comfortable with my surroundings? Am I just now showing that arrogance that young people are so known for possessing where I feel invisible? Or, to keep things on a positive , am I seasoned, cured and ripe; ready for picking. Has the amalgamation of my life experiences finally brought me to a point where things are beginning to make sense in my head? I say beginning to make sense, because by know means, am I trying to express that "I've got it all figured out". I look around at the people I admire and hold in high respect and it seems like most of them have developed the confidence that I so admire, through going through as many experiences as possible, while maintaining the most open of minds throughout those experiences. Letting those experiences flavor them.

When we're very little, the world doesn't have to make sense at all. I was a kid in a family a bit below the average American income. I was raised by two very loving, hardworking parents, and an equally hardworking, loving grandma and family of aunts, uncles and cousins. When both of my parents had to work in the summer, my sister and I would spend the day at grandma's house. Our fun times consisted of spinning out the burnt out back tires on a busted big wheel as we careened down a 45 degree angled hill (that grandma didn't know we were driving down), climbing trees and getting poison ivy in the woods, and "shooting hoops", in which the hoop was a milk crate nailed to a tree in a gravel driveway. I didn't know shit about existentialism or human responsibility and I couldn't even tell you what letters were in the word philosophy, let alone spell it. I probably thought it started with an F. I knew when it rained, you got a coat, and if you heard a jingle in the summer, pull up a couch cushion and start searchin', cause the ice cream man is on the way. Then, in adolescence, the world is so overwhelming that you find yourself letting it tell you what to do. You just strap in and try to find a comfy seat on the ride while you try to figure out why you're getting hair in funny places and girls are making your stomach feel funny. Now, at age 27, things finally feel different. I can stand up and as things come my way, I can at least have an understanding of what they are, and a base of what to expect from my actions. It's a great feeling, but with it comes packaged in a buy one get one free deal with the greatest feeling of all.

Like the quarterback in the football game, I see things taking shape in front of me, and beyond that, I finally feel like I'm in control of what happens next. Because I can see the way things are working and the game has slowed down for me, I now kinda feel like I'm standing in a giant story book that I'm writing as I go.

Whether or not you say hello to someone, whether or not you help that person across the street, or give that person your seat on the bus, or spend that Saturday night working on a project or going out and getting tuned up, whether or not you shake the fear off of your shoulders and go for that job "you probably won't get", whether or not you run that red light, or make that phone call you were afraid to make to that girl you didn't think would give you the time of day, or call your parents just to say you love them, or tell that person that treated you like shit exactly how you feel, or take that drug at the party, or vote for that candidate that for a moment truly made you feel good about the future.

There are always going to be moments in life where things don't make sense, but one thing remains; Every single thing we do in our lives come down to making a decision and those decisions affect the entire world around us. At times, we feel like those decisions don't matter, we feel like the game of life is overwhelming, out of our hands and too much to handle so we sit on the sideline and just let decisions be made by those actually playing the game. In this game of Life, these decisions are the difference between a game winning touchdown and a sack. The more we can look this thing in the face and work towards the outcome we want, the more this game slows down for us all and those decisions can come to us quicker and more naturally.

As I sign off, one final thing... hold me to it... I promise, I've made my final "Fuel of Life" sports reference. Now... ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL!?!?!?!?

The Fuel of Life 5.0: The Soundtrack of Our Lives

We all remember the soundtracks to our favorite movies. Some are so well done, that you can't shake the memories of certain songs from being attached to certain scenes. Think about Pulp Fiction, Requiem for a Dream, Kill Bill, Trainspotting, or Easy Rider. We all know those songs now, and mostly, because of the scenes they starred in. The mood was set, and there was a chemistry between the things going on in the scene, and the song playing with the scene. It's a really crazy feeling, and I know those of us around me who appreciate music as much as I do, have had some of those feelings in our lives, and probably have them once or twice a day. So here's mine...

So I set out this afternoon on my Vespa to grab lunch. I know this'll come with some controversy, but I like to ride with my iPod playing in my ears at a reasonable volume (cue Milton voice). So today, I set out to run some errands and grab some lunch. I roll out, and cue up "Siamese Dream" by the Smashing Pumpkins. If you know me at all, you know that I think this is one of the top ten best albums of the last 20 years without a doubt.

So it's a beautiful day out. The sky is clear and the temperature is hovering around 80, and it's Saturday, so there are people everywhere. As I'm cruising up to the place I originally wanted to grab lunch, "Rocket" begins playing, and I get kicked in the gut with a nostalgic feeling. It was like being reunited with an old friend you haven't seen in a long time. I hadn't done one of these head clearing Vespa rides in a really long time, so I decided, to hell with lunch. We eat to live, we shouldn't live to eat. These are those moments I'm always running my mouth about, so I'm gonna take this one and go with it.

It's been over a month since I last blogged on here. Times have been crazy as hell... I'm moving to Chicago in less than two months. There's so much stuff running through my head these days I can barely keep up. It's been a trying time to say the least. I haven't been able to get a grip on my thoughts and the tasks at hand, let alone, have a cathartic experience I feel is worth writing a Fuel of Life for. That was of course until this afternoon...

When I was riding around listening to "Siamese Dream" and "Carnavas" by Silversun Pickups, I felt untouchable and fearless. I felt like there was nothing I couldn't conquer. It felt the same way that it feels when a really good friend gives you advice and it is exactly what you need to hear. You feel at ease with your thoughts, like everything is lined up in front of you and you can see it all so much more clearly. Like feng shui in your head; your thoughts are organized and presented to you in a peaceful manner, so the rest of your mind and body feels good.

Now I know that somewhere, Billy Corgan is taking his approach to his day, without even the slightest consideration of what the hell I'm up to or whether or not the song he wrote back in the mid 90s is still having an effect on people, but isn't that the beauty of it? I'm cruising around San Diego, struggling to get a handle on what's taking place in my head, and a song he wrote when he had a feeling, which could have been a completely different feeling than I'm having, a song a band performed for the first time probably 15 years ago, is waking me back up and helping things make more sense.

It's almost like it's a time machine. They say that the sense of smell is our strongest human sense when it comes to memory, and I don't know many people that'd argue that one. I still get shivers about my grandpa when I smell cheap cigars, and when I catch a whif of mothballs, I immediately picture my grandmother who died when I was 6 years old. It's the creepiest surprise feeling you can ever have, it's like it comes out of nowhere.

But I feel like the same things happen to me with music. Siamese Dream signifies a very important time in my life. It was a time I was growing out of being a child and trying to figure out who I was and what the hell was going on with me (sounds familiar eh?). Things were changing so fast at such a strange age. The poster was hanging on my angled ceiling in my parent's house and I had to buy the album 3 times because I scratched the hell out of it (I was negligent with my stuff as a kid). Compared to the decisions I face as an adult, the decisions I had back then were something to laugh at. It was a time of innocence, a time when the world felt like it was so huge and something you couldn't even get your hands on. At that age, you were just content to sit back and let it take you where it was going. Today, it was like that was the feeling I got when I listened to the album. The lyrics, the emotions, the fuzzy guitar, the spacy feeling the album has, it all took me back to those days.

It reminded me that everything was going to be alright. I'm at an age now where I feel confident that the decisions I make do have a tremendous affect on things big and small. This world in front of us, is here for us to make something out of, and that can be a pretty overwhelming feeling and at times, can consume you if you try to do too much to fast. Today reminded me that every once in a while, you gotta just let things happen the way they're gonna happen and enjoy the ride. Put on the soundtrack to your life, and let the music remind you that everything is alright and you aren't the only one trying to figure this thing out.

Cheers everyone! Have a great rest of the weekend.

For fun, here's the soundtrack to my life right now. I'd love to see some other people's too.

1. Hummer - Smashing Pumpkins
2. Lazy Eye - Silversun Pickups
3. Golden Path - The Chemical Brothers
4. In and Out of Love - Armin Van Buuren
5. Let it Take You - Goldfrapp
6. Let Forever Be - The Chemical Brothers
7. Soma - Smashing Pumpkins
8. The Time We Lost Our Way - Thievery Corporation
9. Destiny - Zero 7
10. Chicago - Sufjan Stevens
11. Paper Planes - M.I.A
12. Fear Not of Man - Mos Def
13. The Golden Age - Beck
14. In the Garage - Weezer
15. Hollywood Nights - Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band
16. Indian Ocean - West Indian Girl

The Fuel of Life 4.0: The Space Race

The years between 1957 and 1975 is an era known as "The Space Race". The United States and the Soviet Union played a technological tennis match with one another. The USSR builds the first artificial satellite, the United States counters by building the first reusable space craft. The USSR puts the first human in outer space; he orbits the earth for 108 minutes. The United States counters by putting the first man on the moon. This epic battle was over in 1975 when the two countries joined forces and together, launched the first ever multinational manned space mission (SHAMELESS PLUG ALERT – see Fuel of Life 2.0: Strength in Numbers --)

This will forever be known as one of the greatest time periods in human history. Man, through the power of creativity and determination, built machines that took us out of the atmosphere that confines us to this planet, and launched us into a world that we had previously convinced ourselves was untouchable.

Some laws of science were tested, others discovered, and most importantly, the bar was raised as to what the human race thought possible. Technology, physics, philosophy, and the human creative spirit were changed forever.

As with any competition between two parties, there is a prize of some sort. At the time, we weren't sure what we were going to uncover. We knew we were opening a proverbial treasure chest of things we weren't even ready to comprehend, but this wasn't something like finding the cure for a terrible disease. Getting to space was something man wanted to do, not something he needed to do. In one of the grandest examples of human curiosity, two countries spilled millions of dollars and thousands of man hours into space programs (NASA was created during this time period), in an attempt to essentially, "go check out some cool shit". The competition was fierce, dirty, intense, and unforgettable to those that were alive when it was taking place. At the time, the USSR and the United States were busting at the seams with civic pride.

People were proud of their countries. The TVs were tuned in, the radios turned on. Life would be put on hold when a launch took place, or a space craft made a landing. Millions of people were tuned in and listening intently.

When Neil Armstrong said those famous words "One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind", it became an iconographic slogan for the creative, curious human spirit. He was no longer speaking to America, he was speaking to the world and he was speaking to human history.

Fast forward 39 years. It's 2008, there is no more Soviet Union, and the United States isn't exactly the "last great hope" in the world anymore.

Let's for a minute, for the sake of my point, take two things out of this conversation. One being politics; whether you are Democrat, Republican, Libertarian or Green Party is completely irrelevant. Two, let's pretend for a minute that our climate isn't changing on a global scale and that the cars that millions and millions of people drive, aren't slowly destroying the environment. So with that in mind, everything is fine and dandy on earth and the human race just co-exists peacefully with the earth. Someone realizes that you can make a car that is run by electricity, from a power plant that is powered by wind or clean nuclear power. At this point, we've realized that there is a next step; there is a chance to take the bar up a few notches in what we believe to be possible.

What a glaring opportunity to be a part of something astronomically big, a new age of discovery and breakthrough and all we keep hearing from the people up top is how it's not necessary and all these whack excuses for why these exciting ideas won't work. We've even been lied to on multiple occasions about things. Stats have been flubbed or hidden, good ideas have been purchased and destroyed and all in the name of remaining stagnant (and of course, the all powerful dollar).

Let's again, put a few things to the side before we continue. Let's, for a minute forget that creating alternative energy solutions would only prove beneficial to us as a people, and a country. First of all, we would do a huge justice to the planet, which I want my children to be able to enjoy as much as I have, and millions of jobs would be created. The industrial age created jobs, followed by the technology age, and now, in this corporate age, jobs are being shipped out of our country and family's are left to fend for themselves. It almost seems canibalistic doesn't it? If we were to begin building a foundation of an industry like alternative energy, we would only strengthen our country mentally and economically in a time where both states are currently very weak.

If we could get back to celebrating that idea of being the first ones to do it, like we had so proudly during the Space Race, we could restore a much needed sense of true civic pride to our country, which is a seed of prosperity in and of itself, and also a new level of pride in the human spirit that I feel many people haven't had a chance to experience in their lifetime.

There are bigger things at play here than jobs and civic pride though.

Where has our sense of exploration and curiosity that makes us the most complex, amazing species on earth gone? Have we forgotten our true potential? Are we afraid to face the fact that while the world is bigger than we can comprehend, there are few things that are impossible? There are only a few people left on this planet that were alive in a time period when getting to space was considered impossible.

Of course for environmental reasons, I think alternative energy is a vital step we need to take, and are taking at a snail's pace (the first solar powered satellite was built 50 years ago), but to hell with the environment for a second. Let's think of bigger, deeper, bolder reasons to evolve into things like alternative energy.
The rewards that humanity reaped for the Space Race age were endless, but the biggest reward was that the human race was reminded once again that our mind is as powerful as anything else in this universe. Creativity, curiosity, exploration, discovery, intelligence, responsibility, progress; celebrating these characteristics is what makes us unique to this planet; from fire to electricity, from the wheel to the telecommunications satellites, from palm tree huts to Frank Lloyd Wright, the worlds biggest breakthroughs happen, not because we decide we need them to happen, but rather, they are a result of that voice in our head that won’t shut up. The voice telling us to investigate and explore the limits of what we’re told is impossible.

I feel confident that I am part of a proud human race that is beginning to hear that voice and listen again. Furthermore, lately, I’ve been very proud of my generation. I see us coming up on a corner here in the near future where some serious shit is about to take place, and more and more every day, I’m seeing people my age stand up and take responsibility for turning the wheel as we approach that corner. Needless to say, it feels exciting to be alive right now.

To me, it looks like we’re all forming quite a pit crew for the next big race. I hope we qualify in the time trials. They’re coming up soon!

The Fuel of Life 3.0: Put the Shovel Down

“It was once said, if you’re tryin to make it out of a hole, stop diggin first”.

I’m not sure who it was that originally said that, but the inspiration came to me in the form of a song lyric. The lyricist is an old friend of mine from Kent State University. I met him while being trained to be a media insect at the Daily Kent Stater, and simultaneously getting some of the most useful education of my entire life in the Pan African Studies department at Oscar Ritchie hall (ask me what I learned there, I dare you).

His name is Sam, but most who know him know him as “Blitz”. He was originally born in Ghana. While I was pretty close to him for a short time in Kent, I am not sure what brought his family to the US. I do know that there were military coups that were taking place between the late 50s and late 70s in Ghana, but I’m not going to speculate. Anyways, Blitz was an up and coming hip hop artist in the Akron/Cleveland area. Just to clear something up, that means about as good as being an up and coming hip hop artist from Juno Alaska, or Lincoln, Nebraska. Not much is happening in the Akron/Cleveland area in 2004. Blitz was inspiring, his lyrics were deep and inspired and transgressed lines that kept most people separated. I had a good feeling that this was one of those special people that were gonna put a big mark on this world.

Recently, when I heard Blitz’s song “Black Market”, that included the aforementioned lyric, while having some people over for a weekend stress release, I decided to look him up and see how he was doing, which of course means Myspace. Took me about 5 minutes to realize what I expected. Blitz took himself out of what was keeping him from his dream, packed up his shit, made his way to New York City and has since opened for legendary acts like KRS-One, Public Enemy and the more recent legends, Dead Prez. These are hip hop artists whose names will never be forgotten; mold breakers, idea shakers, history makers. If you play guitar, these are your Hendrix, Page, Townsend, B.B. King types.

Blitz was in a position where things that, for the most part, were out of his control, were keeping him from his goals and he took the huge, necessary steps needed to make his ultimate goals happen. You could say, he was in a hole that he needed out of, so he put the shovel down and started making some rope.

Blitz was one of those people you like to have around because he doesn’t have goals, he has big, ultimate goals. You know ultimate goals, the ones where everyone around you tells you you’re crazy for going after them. You know the people that have them; the artist, the dancer, the fashion designer, the globe trotter, the base jumper, the writer, the humanitarian, the activist, the poet, the physicist, the “every once in a while” politician… I’ll get back to that. The people that take this structured system that we’re working under, and they put dents in it, the really pesky kinds of dents that you just have to deal with. When enough of these people get together and through some space, time continuum act of the universe, are pushing at the same time, those dents turn into cracks that spider and get bigger, joining other cracks until the system can’t take it anymore and some serious shit happens.

I’m a 27-year-old American. That means I’ve spent my entire post high school life under the Bush/Cheney regime. If there’s ever been a period in post slavery America, where we’ve dug as deep as we possibly could without as much as stopping to wipe the sweat from our foreheads, it is right now. The world hates us, we’re weak in thought, spirit and pride. Not to mention structurally weak; the economy, strength of our military at home and abroad, education, health care, unity and our class structure. I could ramble on and on, but then my positive point will be lost in this muck.

I have been inspired lately as an American more than I can ever remember in my life. I’ve had a presidential nominee bring me to tears on multiple occasions. I’m not too sappy a guy. I mean, who didn’t cry and the end of “the Pursuit of Happyness” right? But the tears that well up in my eyes are a kind I’ve never had the pleasure of experiencing. They are the tears of true inspiration and hope. Frankly, I wish I’ve never had to experience such tears. It says a lot about where we’ve allowed us to go as a country. Hope that brings you to tears, is a sign that you feel near rock bottom.

It’s finally happening to the people of my country; blue collar, White collar, white, black, brown, red, male, female, young, old. We’re finally showing that we want out of the hole we’re in and we’re gonna stop digging. We’re putting the shovels down, looking at one another in the face, sharing the rations of water we’ve got, and addressing the real problem, how are we getting out of here? I know such a drastic, beautiful, necessary change scares some people, I can even understand why. The cool, temperate, controlled confines of the hole have become comfortable. Well, kind of… We’ve been scared into thinking that the hole is protecting us from some big, dangerous, monster that’s waiting outside, and who doesn’t enjoy a comfortable, protected space when what’s outside of that space is waiting to eat you alive… right?

I’ve been hearing a lot of those scared people saying a lot of the same things lately. “Well, he needs to be careful. He’s gonna fill the American people with all this hope and excitement, and he’s gonna have a lot to live up to.” Or… “It’s all just talk, I mean, what’s he actually gonna be able to do once he gets elected?” I guess for me, it goes in one ear and out the other. I’ve been force fed fear since my first day as an adult in this country and this time, you’re gonna have to try a bit harder than that.

I’ve found myself in some holes lately, whether it be on a personal level or just looking at the overall picture we’re in as a nation, and it is friends like Blitz (among many, many others) and inspiring leaders like Barack Obama who remind me that it’s time to put the shovel down and start coming up with a solution. So I’m gonna get as much dirt off my hands and see if I can’t turn this shovel handle into a ladder. “Who’s comin’ with me?”

Please check out my friend “Blitz: the Ambassador” on his myspace profile here for plenty more inspirational lyrics.

The Fuel of Life 2.0: Strength in Numbers

"We are all in it together, act accordingly"

Oh the lost art of working together.

Simply put, when we hear "let's work together", I think for the most of us, we conjure up images of people lifting or pushing heavy things or building stuff. There's the occasional footage of people putting up a makeshift floodwall of sand bags, or the images we'll never forget from 9/11 where for one stretch of a few weeks, men of all color and creed, were standing on top of piles of smoldering hot rubble, giving everything they had to one another in an attempt at finding "something" together.

When people combine their efforts for a common cause, the job gets accomplished more efficiently and with a more complete outcome than if we did it on our own. Ancient, modern and everything in between, man stands stronger when man stands together.

We are reminded of this by the actions of our fellow men and women. The Greek forum (which essentially, later became what we consider our senate) that revolutionized the idea of power to the people, was a celebration of the fact that we all have something to say and we all have something to offer in the creation of the world around us. Martin Luther King Jr., Marcus Garvey and Malcolm X were powerful, amazing "only once in a while does a person like this come along" individuals who had the power to rally people around them in the spirit of changing things. Without the support and passion of people, those men would've stood alone and they carried themselves and delivered their teachings accordingly. the Cuban Missile crisis, a moment in American history that could've resulted in absolute nuclear holocaust. As you look back to the pictures of those 13 days, you see many repeating images of president Kennedy with his brother Bobby. They're both deep in though trying to figure out how to prevent the destruction of our country and prevent a 300 year speed bump in the progression of the human race at the helm of nuclear science. Many believe that without the wise words of his brother Bobby, President Kennedy may have been led into a decision with irreparable consequences that could've started a new dark age of man. Without those two amazing minds getting together, swallowing their egos, and putting the better good of humanity first, who knows if we'd be right now. In the 70s era of the Black Panther movement, the Black Panther Party was one of the most feared organizations in the country. They stood for change and they demanded respect and fair treatment to their people, and the end of the race based structure that existed in America. Their goal was to restore pride and confidence in a people who had their entire history stripped off of their backs before they even arrived on this country's soil. The epicenter of the Black Panther Party was Oakland California. It is a little known fact that during this time period, "Hippies" from San Francisco were helping to stealthily commute Black Panthers around in their VW Busses while they were being hunted down by the authorities from the top down (see... COINTELPRO). Of course, all of the major steps that the Black Panther Party was taking, can not be credited to the actions of a few hippies in busses, but let's not forget the small actions of a few people to reach out and work together to get something profound accomplished.

One of the greatest freedoms a human can have is the freedom to be unique. The current state of our administration or the things being across the world in the name of America, have absolutely no barring on the fact that we still have the right to be who we are and no one can take that away from us. This is something we should celebrate as the element that makes us such a unique species.

I ask the question, have we celebrated this to the point that we've become a completely narcissistic society? Have we celebrated the ego and the creative, unique spirit to the point that we've forgotten that we can accomplish so much more without putting ourselves first? Even beyond that, it's almost as if there are people out there that believe they're great at everything to the point that they don't need any help, or they know that they aren't great at certain things but see it as a weakness and feel like less of a person because of it.

Maybe we're lost in the idea of strength and weakness. Today, as a man, to admit that you can't do something is a sign of weakness, and weakness is a sign that you're less of a man. Wow... that's a vicious cycle. Right now, I promise there are a few of you reading this, wondering how I can even challenge the idea and may even think I'm less of a man for thinking that such a thing should be challenged.

The fact is, and this a damned beautiful fact, we are an imperfect species. From the fragile organ system that is still trying to figure out how to adapt to the world around us, to the strengths and weaknesses I spoke of before. Each one of us has an amazing ability to do something unique, something that no one else does the same way and as a natural fact, we aren't nearly as good at other things.

But let us not forget, someone around us is good at those other things. Some of the best relationships in our lives will be with someone who sees nearly everything from a different perspective. It takes someone who may be completely wild and without boundaries, and bring them back to earth. It may also take someone who is extremely organized and driven, and take them to places they wouldn't have gone alone. An emotional person needs a logical person around and visa versa.

When we can help one another plug the certain holes in our lives and/or our personalities by using our innate abilities for good, as a people, we become a fucking unstoppable force to be reckoned with. By realizing that there are things we are great at, and at the same time, celebrating the things that others around us can do, while still selflessly offering our services with the things we can do, I believe we can move forward to places we don't think are possible.

When it comes down to it, this idea spans many aspects of our world. Ultimately, we will shed ourselves of this maniacal ego we have developed and begin seeing the man next to us as someone with something to offer rather than someone preventing us from being the ultimate man. We will finally break down these walls that we have put up between one another that should've been broken down centuries ago with the invention of the boat. When you have something to offer this world and dammit, we all do, fucking share it! When you see someone lying on the ground that needs help up, don't hesitate for a second to stick out your arm and help them up and dammit, when you're on the ground and need help up, don't be afraid to stick your arm out for help. You aren't going anywhere as a person and we aren't going anywhere as a people by bottling up our abilities and strengths and keeping them to ourselves because we are all in this together and personally, I think we should start acting accordingly.

The Fuel of Life 1.0: What is the Fuel of Life?

"Life is nothing more than an amalgamation of our experiences and the decisions that we make"

If there is one thing that I've heard in the last few months of my life that I feel rings more true than anything else, it would be this.

Every day that each of us is alive is an opportunity to become a more complete individual. We wake up... we roll out of bed and in front of us lies an endless world of possibility. There is no way out of it. We have the freedom to do whatever it is we please and many of us don't realize that the things we do have the power to completely change the course of the world as we know it.

Be it instant gratification and over stimulation, the pains of living in a corporate society concerned more with streamlining, efficiency and the ever so powerful America dollar than the human condition and morality. Be it credit card debt, the costs of staying healthy or the fact that most of us are living paycheck to paycheck or working 3 jobs between two people just to maintain a sustainable, comfortable life. None the less, something has made us lose sight of the world in front of us.

While I may play the niche as the over analytical person when it comes to my friendships, I think when I say the "fuel of life", I believe everyone can relate to me. The fuel of life is that thing or those things that make you feel alive. It is the event that takes place that make you feel like you're more complete than the person you were before. That gut feeling you get when you meet someone and have a conversation and you know that this person is going to have a signifigance in your life... one way or another. That feeling we get when get done doing something we've just done for the first time. That tingly feeling that runs through your arms and legs. That same feeling you have a taste of when you wake up every morning and become conscious of your surroundings. That feeling you get when you know you've done something you were afraid of or challenged yourself and met that challenge.

If you ask me, the experiences that make people feel the most alive are the ones that challenge us to think differently, to push our own personal limits. The experiences that make us throw almost everything we thought we knew before, out the window to the street below to be swept away and taken to the trash.

Being the kid from a racist family who decides to think for himself and actually try talking to someone his family taught him to fear. Being the person who was always taught to stay within the lines and to not cross the street before looking both ways, and decides to buy a one way ticket to Europe on a whim to confront that condition and learn who you really are. Being raised in a household of staunch Christian values and actually forcing yourself to read the teachings of the Dali Llama or the Koran, or better yet, the teachings of Kant, or Ayn Rand, or Nietzsche so that you can formulate how you feel about things.

As a 26 year old, I feel like a lot of my peers are looking back down the road they've already driven and remembering their early 20s as the most exciting times of their lives. Other people my age are making what I feel is a worse mistake of looking towards the future with fear that the good times are over for all of us. Some people go as far as believing that "life" is over once you turn 30. Wow!!! A third the way to the average life expectancy and you're already giving up.

When did people stop realizing that no matter how old you are, what job your work or what you did 10 years ago with your college buddies, there is still a huge world out there for us to shape for ourselves? There is still a copious amount of conversation to be had, emotions to be felt, decisions to be made, passion to be exuded, responsibility to be taken, and life to be led.

Responsibility.... Ah responsibility... such a simple word to many of us, yet it is the backbone for modern philosophy as I have been exposed to it. We aren't talking about whether or not you took responsibility and went out to apply for a job, or did your homework, or your chores before dinner. Responsibility in the sense that, as far as we know it, we only have this one life to live. We're put on this earth as these amazing individuals who are creative and intelligent. We have an innate ability to decide for ourselves and be unique and whether it be to the social constructs that we've put in place, or be it a lack of passion and desire within us as a people, so many of us have forgotten these things. I talk of the responsibility to realize the power that we have as people and the right we all have to enjoy this life and make it best for ourselves.

Talking to someone over a beer and a campfire and telling them how you truly feel about something and sticking by that. Taking responsibility for our effect on this world around us. Taking responsibility for our emotions and seeing them as a way to grow as a person and embrace this beautiful life around us. When something makes you happy, breaking your mold of fear and fucking going for it, and damn it, I mean GOING FOR IT! The type of going for it that it's almost dangerous with wreckless abandon. The type of "Going for it" that if you happen to not get it, you can still lie face up on your death bed and smile knowing there was nothing else you could do about it cause you fucking went for it. When someone or something makes you unhappy or doesn't pay you the respect granted to every member of this human race, taking that and breaking it apart into little tiny pieces and promising to yourself that you will never sell yourself short like that again. When that voice in your head whispers to you that something is right... listening and trusting. That voice will be with you until you're on that death bed. Make sure that voice is smiling just as wide as you are.

It was another good friend of mine who told me the other day... something like... "Every life is a storybook full of chapters that we write ourselves. We all know the beginning of the story (birth) and we all know the end (death). Writing the rest of the story is the fun part."

We need to stop seeing the end of our story be while we're still alive. I feel like I, along with anyone else of my age, has experienced sooooo much. So many things that we can smile about and be happy that we did, and at the same time, so many things that make us sad when we remember them, but they've all helped mold us into who we are as individuals and if we think for a second that the things that are about to happen to us aren't going to do the same, we are doing ourselves a disservice.

We are writing this book as we go. The experiences, the stories, the conversation, the drug experiences, the road trips, the family dinners, the cocktails, the happy hours, the hugs, the favors, the giving of gifts to one another just because, the holidays. If we don't take up the responsibility in ourselves, we aren't writing this story, we're letting our experiences write it for us. By embracing the things that come our way and taking them for what they are, we're getting the ink on our fingers and writing the story ourselves. We're turning our own lives into non-fiction, and god damned good, new york times 10 best seller list non-fiction.

It is scientific law that to have momentum, you have to have force. Maybe we all just need that "push" to keep us moving forward with life like we were when we were younger. Maybe we all need a bit of the "fuel of life".

Start a bonfire and have a conversation, turn on some music, turn the lights down low and actually listen to an entire album, sit in the grass and take a nap in the middle of the park by the ocean, give someone a hug, talk to someone you don't know much about... or even better..... try talking to someone you don't think you like very much. Do something you've always known you've wanted to do for yourself but have been too afriad to do. Talk to someone your family taught you to be afraid of, drive down a road that you are unfamiliar with. Do something that makes you feel... Alive!